How Is Your Husband Known?

“Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.”  Proverbs 31:23

Every wife would love to know that her husband is respected and well regarded by other people.  No woman wants to be married to a man who is scorned or not taken seriously in regard to his work and personal ethics.

A wife should feel that her husband is an important man in her life…but he should not be important to her alone.    A man’s work was never meant to be a life of just serving his wife and children only, although a good man will work hard to provide for his own as the Bible teaches.   He was not created solely for the purpose of just taking care of his wife. 

So many times I have noticed couples who are eager to “do something for the Lord” through the Lord’s church and they climb on board the work train with much anticipation and excitement!  Perhaps the Lord allows them to teach a class, sing in the choir or be involved in music.  Maybe it’s helping in a vacation Bible school or helping in some other ministry of the church.  They are overjoyed to be “serving the Lord together”!

Then….time goes by….

Children responsibilities come along….

Realities of life and time crunches set in…..

Their excitement and their perspective begin to fade……

This once eager couple now starts acting like they have so much to do that they can’t possibly get it all done and it begins to look and sound as though the “ministry” they once longed for is now in the way of their real life.

What happened?  They failed to realize that when making a vow to serve the Lord with their life and time that with that decision, came the responsibility of placing their commitment to serving the Lord higher on their priority list.  It is right to put your family’s spiritual well being first on your list, for you will answer to God for that.  But your family’s soccer, basketball, shopping, music lessons and lawn mowing schedule is not to pre-empt your commitment to serving the Lord and being faithful in it.

I want to encourage all the wives who have a husband who holds a prominent position in the Lord’s church and is depended on from week to week by others.   You are to be a help to him, in seeing that he is able to fulfill his ministry role and to do it with excellence and in faithfulness.  The man who “is known in the gates”, has obviously made a reputation for himself…but his wife had a hand in that too.

How does a wife help her man in this way?

1.  Do you have supper ready on time for your husband so he can eat leisurely, in order to be at church on time to fulfill his “ministry”?   No one should have to wait on your husband because of something you failed to consider and accomplish as a helpmeet to him.   If your husband is chronically late….he will be known among the elders of the land but it will not be favorable for him.   Wife….you can help him be on time and be known as a dependable and faithful man!  Have his meal ready.  Have clean neatly pressed clothes ready for him. 

2.  If your husband teaches a class or has an Institute class that he must study for, do you provide time and a quiet place for him to accomplish what he has committed to do for the Lord?  So many times, a man will rush home from his job to find supper not ready, the house in chaos and he still has spiritual commitments that he is expected to do.  

 Dear wife….please don’t expect him to come home to rescue you when you know he has committed himself spiritually in other areas.  Help him!  Have the home front prepared for his return in order to make it easy for your man to “serve the Lord”.  Do your part to assist your husband to faithful service for the Lord.

3.  Find ways to happily help him!  Don’t ever be a wife who sees her husband’s spiritual commitments as “his job” and you don’t have any part of it.  You may not do what he is doing but you should help him in ways that will support what he is committed to doing.  Don’t be indifferent to what he feels the Lord has called him to do.  Something is spiritually wrong with a wife who begrudges  the spiritual work her husband is endeavoring to do.  Don’t complain about the time he spends in service for the Lord.

    
Something is spiritually wrong with your love for Christ if you criticize or question your husband’s motives for wanting to serve the Lord.   Examine your heart….

Your husband is known by you too.   Do you try to make him “look good”?  There is an old saying that goes something like this…

“ Behind every good man ….is a good woman.”

There is more truth than fiction in this statement.  I’ve also heard it said by many that….

“She is the making of the man.”

A wife can also be the ruin of a man with good potential!  What is your help and influence doing to your man?  Are you a noose around his neck or a blessing to his heart and ministry for Christ?

I challenge you to give this some thought as you consider your position as a help meet to your husband…